Saturday, March 19, 2011

When one dream dies, Dream your next Dream

Post my first 16 mile run, I suffered injuries from a bruised left shin bone.  It turns out that it was a result of a misalignment of my left side that primarily came from my weak left glutes (think butt cheek!).  I was fascinated by how the connections from my hip all the way down to my foot could basically cause such a collapse as one part started weakening.  I have tried many times to run again, only to result in massive pain in my ankle and foot.  After assessing the bruise and how weak my left glute has become, I had to give up on my dream to finish the LA Marathon  – my FIRST marathon.  WAH!~  I was very discouraged, I felt like a failure, my ego was bruised… I was upset to say the least.  Luckily, I had a two week vacation in Argentina to help me overcome the disappointment faster, but limping on hikes and sometimes on just random walks and short runs were hurtful reminders that I was not going to be able to do the marathon. 

I kept telling people, “yeah, I’m not doing the marathon…I’m injured...i tried my best, but 16 miles was the max my body could handle.”  Then I just got sick of hearing myself say words of defeat over and over.  I had to ask myself, ok, what’s next??

Two objectives:
  1. Strengthen weak parts of my body, re-establish structural integrity of my body
  2. 7/30 Vineman Aquabike – 2.4 mile swim, 112 mile bike.  NO RUN (hooray!)

Which means, I get to still train with a goal while working on my weaknesses.  I’m already sick of talking about my injury and WHY I’m not doing the LA marathon – so I need to move on and talk about what I will be doing instead! 

When one dream dies, dream your next dream… don’t dwell on old disappointments, don’t fold your enthusiasm because of a road block…even road blocks are a platform to grow and improve, depending on what you do with it.  Does this mean that I will not run again?  No – I will work on strengthening my hips and legs (and I’ve been saying this for years, but obviously I need to do it BETTER), while still expanding my swimming and biking capabilities.  When I know I can try again for a marathon, I will go for it.  I have not dropped my BIG dream, which is to one day complete an Ironman distance triathlon.  I’m just working towards it…whatever path is presented before me (obviously that path is way longer than I thought!), I must follow and keep striving.

Big dreams, then smaller dreams that make us get us there…we must DO to achieve them..and DOING includes trying, failing, and yes of course, succeeding, which is the most exhilarating part of it all.  I crave that moment, and it is my hunger for that sense of accomplishment that I’m willing to weather a few failures too on the way…

This week’s small successes:
  • Got back on the bike – for the first time since May last year.  I know, pathetic!  But guess what, I got back, and I’m starting from scratch and building up…
  • Got back on the swim – for the first time since September last year.  I have gained about 15 seconds to my 100m.  So I obviously have another swim goal for the next month or so :)
  • Identified key problem areas that contributed to my injury and developed exercise program that would help eliminate those problems (and already did a couple of sessions…whoa, serious soreness, but already feel the difference!)

My mind is focused, my body is already waking up from the various ailments as I removed one significant conflicting element in my life (will have another blog entry on this), and I am just amazingly ready for what’s next.  I feel that I’m finally back to where I was, mind and body, when I was prepping for my half ironman race in 2009.  Clean body, clean mind, just a very very clear focus and amazing level of positive energy… man, it took a while to get back to that state.  

So, what is your next dream?  And what are you going to do today to get closer?

1 comment:

Blue Lou said...

My goal is to feel better and work on my diet the most and get back into working out, since my accident things have slowed down.

You are NOT a failure at all! I am so very jealous of your success and even what you consider to be a failure, is still suceeding compared to what I was doing for a while.

Youre just an amazing person and the new dreams sound amazing! I am excited for you, thats something that would be more my style because of my health issues. I used to bike all the time and I miss it and swimming has always been a favorite but I cant push to hard otherwise I pull some weird chest muscles.

But as I said, I am SUPER excited for you and glad to see you blogging again! You are such an inspiration to others with or without health problems!